(C) Mayumi Oda |
I have many aliases: my Russian names, surnames, my father's, husband's name, etc. And all these names were all over my papers and none of them fit me very well, so finally I decided to change it into one coherent name. In Russia, middle name of men and women is the first name of their father. So my middle name was "Vladimir", which is quite strange for americans, so I decided to get myself a new, more feminine middle name. And my husband helped me to find it. He gave me a present, a book by Mayumi Oda "GODDESSES". I thought, I am sure I'll find my name here! Slowly I was reading the book. It's is Mayumi Oda's story and besides that there're beautiful illustrations - "woodblocks of treasure". She writes, that in Japanese Buddhist tradition there are so few female images of deities, and that she was wondering what they would look like? Being a great artist, know as "Matisse of Japan", she started to explore, and created 33 Goddesses. I would look at every illustration and see what, or rather who, fits me? Toward the end of the book I was almost desperate, but when I turned to the last page and saw a beautiful red goddess, I immediately knew. The description said:
Goddess of Love
Aizen Myoo, Rangaraja, is a God of penetrating love, and is always depicted as an angry figure. His anger reminds us of the power to transform desire and passion into compassion. My Goddess of Love is the inspiration of love itself.
I studied Buddhism and I know a little about symbolism, but I needed to know more about the stuff Aizen is holding, so I looked through Robert Beer "Tibetan Buddhist Symbols Knowledge Cards. I Learned a lot (and re-wrote a little ;)):
The Lotus (Sanskrit padma, kamala, utpala). It' is a major Buddhist symbol of purity and Divine Birth. It represents the blossoming of all virtuous activities, and freedom from karma (cyclic existence). "The lotus seats upon which deities sit or stand symbolizes their Divine Origin an innate perfection of their body, speech and mind. There are different color lotuses and they have different meanings.
The Vajra (Tibetan dorje) and The Bell. "The vajra represents the male aspect of method of skillful means, the bell the female aspect of Wisdom and Awareness. Together they embody the perfect union of Compassion and Wisdom.
The Flower Bow (Sanskrit pushpadhanus) and Flower Arrow (Sanskrit pushpasara). Arrows fashioned from white lotus, red ashoka (Divine herb for removing grief), mango flowers, white jasmine and blue lotus flowers. The Bow is made from nectar-laden red utpala lotus flowers and leaves. Together they mean awareness and wisdom.
There is one more symbol - an apple, the description of which I couldn't find in Buddhist sources. I am from the East, from Blessed Kazakhstan, the place where apples originated, so I thought, I should know. The apple is a symbol of Teaching and Learning.
I like my name. And I a very thankful to Mayumi Oda.
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